After tonight only a quintet of hopefuls will be left standing. The show's barely begun when musical guest Rascal Flatts is introduced to perform their new single "Unstoppable." Gary LeVox's voice sounds extra whiny and strangled tonight. Once again, the irony of the show is that the established artists can sound crappy and the ones competing for a shot at a career can't. Lesson? Get a record deal and you're allowed to sound like garbage!
In the Ford video (for some song called "Believe") they all get to be vampires except for Michael, who plays the attack victim that scares them off with a garlic pizza. It actually made me laugh, simpleton that I am.
I'll skip the Shrek promotional stuff and get to the results.
Siobhan Magnus is sent to the far side of the stage.
Aaron Kelly is sent to the center of the stage.
Michael Lynche is sent to the near side of the stage.
Lee DeWyze joins Siobhan.
Casey James joins Michael.
Crystal Bowersox joins Aaron.
Ryan leads Siobhan over to Michael and Casey and proclaims them the Bottom 3. That was weird. Also, who'd have figured Casey to end up in the Bottom 3 after most people considered him the best of the night? I'd be shocked if he went home, and Siobhan got the pimp spot, so...my prediction that Michael's leaving looks solid right about now.
Carrie Underwood introduces the next musical guest, some band called Sons of Sylvia. Hey, wait a minute! That's not just "some band," those are The Clark Brothers, who won The Next Great American Band! They were great. Too bad no one watched that show except me and my mother. Apparently their album is finally being released, and this is their single, called "Love Left to Lose." What's with this opening part? Is that a mic problem or is he breathing too heavily? Aside from those early sound issues, I kind of like the song. It doesn't sound very country, though. It comes across more like some modern rhythmic-pop type of thing with a little mandolin and fiddle thrown in. I'd be happy for these guys if they had some success with this song, because they're a talented bunch of dudes.
Next is Lady Antebellum with "Need You Now." According to Wikipedia this song was released last August, but for some reason I feel like I remember hearing it regularly on CMT back when I still lived with my parents, which was a year and a half ago. I know I've heard it in passing in public places, but I don't think that'd account for it. I hardly listen to the radio. Did they perform this song live on CMT before it was recorded? Am I just going crazy? Argh! Whatever the reason, I know this song better than I probably should.
Boy, they just won't stop throwing musical guests at us, will they? Next it's Shakira and Rascal Flatts! Darn you, Rascal Flatts. Because I like country music I feel forced to tape this due to your inclusion. Surprisingly, there's something captivating about this song (apparently called "Gypsy"). There are gypsy-style backup dancers on stage, and Gary LeVox joining in adds little to the performance. You know what? Recapping these result shows is really getting boring. I think I may retire from the recapping business once this season is done.
Finally some results. Michael is safe! Wow! I thought he was a goner for sure! So the one leaving is...Siobhan. Wow! That pimp spot sure has lost its power over the last two seasons! She sings out with "Think," and of course includes the annoying glory note my brother hates so much. There's still some time left after she's done singing, so we get to see her give out hugs and talk to the judges a little before the credits roll. They sure packed a lot into this hour, didn't they?
Power rankings:
5. Aaron Kelly
4. Michael Lynche
3. Casey James
2. Lee DeWyze
1. Crystal Bowersox
No comments because they're pretty much the same as what I've been saying all season.
Next week Harry Connick Jr. mentors the Idols on the songs of Frank Sinatra. In other words, it's Standards Week designed to honor a specific performer, who just happens to have sung most of them. See you next time!
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Top 6 - This Does Impress Me Much
Tonight we're dipping into a "very special songbook," that of the "iconic" Shania Twain. Really? Shania Twain? I mean, she has some good songs, her career has proven to have longevity, but...icon? I've never thought of her that way. Well, the video package tells us she's the one who made country pop (oh, that was her?), so I guess the country music industry owes her a "thank you" for all the dough she's made them. I guess this also counts as our official "country music" week. This has potential. Even though I'm not some Shania Twain superfan, I do like her songs. They range from the funny and playful to the sweet and beautiful. Shania herself is a winner too. She's a good-looking woman with a goofy Canadian accent. I'm not complaining!
Lee-ding off is Lee DeWyze, with "You're Still the One." It's probably one of her most recognizable songs, so good choice, my man. This is nothing more than a typical Lee performance. It's not bad, but those off-key moments have been sticking out to me more recently. There's nothing terribly special here overall. Of course, I don't get to enjoy this performance fully, because my TV reception is a bit choppy, and several moments get blanked out. From the majority that I hear though, it's merely decent. Though none of the judges sound blown away by it, there's nothing but positivity on the panel. I guess being the chosen male contestant has its built-in advantages.
Michael Lynche is next with "It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing," a slow ballad. I rather enjoy this. The vocals are once again in "just pretty good" territory, but I like the song itself, and he seems to be feeling it a little more than usual. At the moment I'm writing this, I might call it one of my favorites from him. The judges all love that he connected to the song and Simon's only gripe is that the performance is "wet." When asked for an explanation, Simon can only say it seemed girly. Oh, Simon. Do you even pay attention to what the theme is each week?
Casey James is really excited about this week's performance, because he wants the chance to show people something new after two weeks of staying in his comfort zone. The song is "Don't," which I'm not familiar with. Other than the usual distracting goatiness, this is really good. I'm not sure if it's Casey though, or the higher production values for the night. After a season of complaining about the mix, I have to complement the sound crew for this week. The judges say it's his best performance yet, and that he's progressing as an artist. Mmmmm, I don't agree. "Jealous Guy" was much better. This may be second-best though, as he put some soul into it for a change.
Crystal Bowersox picked "No One Needs to Know" to drop a hint to her boyfriend about proposing. Is this the same guy she has the kid with? If so, seriously, just get hitched already. Crystal's the first contestant of the night to embrace the theme, as this is straight-up acoustic country, not pop. It's incredible: every week Crystal finds some way to stand out from the pack. As usual, she delivers the song perfectly, and the rest of the competition pales in comparison. While it may not have been one of her best from an artistic standpoint, I might call it one of my personal favorite Crystal performances. The first three judges say it wasn't their favorite, but she's so good it doesn't matter. Simon actually gives it a bad review, but we know that's because he doesn't like country music. Whatever. I'm allowed to disagree with the judges. I say it was another great job by the Bowersoxer (do I come up with clever nicknames or what?).
I can't believe he's still in the competition, but Aaron Kelly is up next with "You've Got a Way." There are some bad vocal moments (like, pretty much always), but Aaron gives it his best effort, and his glory note at the end is strong. My problem here is that this is sort of a boring song without much of a hook. However good his vocals may be, I'm not particularly interested in anything that's going on here. The judges think he did a great job, and Simon says he's improved after struggling the last two weeks. Maybe I'm just getting bored with Aaron, as all his performances pretty much feel like the same thing. The kid's a singer, not an artist, and there's only so much he's capable of doing with anything he sings. This might be the weakest of the night so far, though that's hardly an insult on a night when no one's really stunk.
Finally, Little Miss Weird, Siobhan Magnus, takes on Shania's first #1 country hit, "Any Man of Mine." Will it go over better than Mandisa's oust-inducing version from Season 5? Well, it starts out sounding like it'll be fun and upbeat, but Siobhan's vocals are tepid and the song feels like it's moving too slowly. Siobhan walks on the platform behind the judges to add some visual stimulation, but it comes across as robotic, and the only powerful moment is when she does her screechy glory note at the end. At last we have a performance worthy of being called "worst of the night." Can her fanbase, Vote For the Worst and the pimp spot save her? Now that I've trashed it, what do the judges think? Whaddayaknow? They all love it, even Simon! Kara also tells her she's "back." Wow. I have no words. This disconnect with reality is nothing short of surreal. Are they just desperate to keep another girl in the competition after the men have dominated the later stages the last two seasons?
My performance ranking:
Crystal (8.5/10)
Casey (7.5/10)
Michael (6.5/10)
Lee (6/10)
Aaron (5/10)
Siobhan (2/10)
Predictions:
Bottom 3: Aaron, Michael, Lee
Going home: Michael
Aaron seems like the obvious choice to go, since he would appear to have the least widespread appeal, and he's been in the Bottom 3 several times now. However, I'm picking Michael to go, since he went early and I'm having a hard time remembering his performance even after recalling I liked it. It's all so up-in-the-air right now that I feel like anyone could potentially go home, so I'll go with what I've got here.
Without Tim there was no one to vote for, which was good, because it meant I got to enjoy my rerun of LOST in peace! See you tomorrow!
Lee-ding off is Lee DeWyze, with "You're Still the One." It's probably one of her most recognizable songs, so good choice, my man. This is nothing more than a typical Lee performance. It's not bad, but those off-key moments have been sticking out to me more recently. There's nothing terribly special here overall. Of course, I don't get to enjoy this performance fully, because my TV reception is a bit choppy, and several moments get blanked out. From the majority that I hear though, it's merely decent. Though none of the judges sound blown away by it, there's nothing but positivity on the panel. I guess being the chosen male contestant has its built-in advantages.
Michael Lynche is next with "It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing," a slow ballad. I rather enjoy this. The vocals are once again in "just pretty good" territory, but I like the song itself, and he seems to be feeling it a little more than usual. At the moment I'm writing this, I might call it one of my favorites from him. The judges all love that he connected to the song and Simon's only gripe is that the performance is "wet." When asked for an explanation, Simon can only say it seemed girly. Oh, Simon. Do you even pay attention to what the theme is each week?
Casey James is really excited about this week's performance, because he wants the chance to show people something new after two weeks of staying in his comfort zone. The song is "Don't," which I'm not familiar with. Other than the usual distracting goatiness, this is really good. I'm not sure if it's Casey though, or the higher production values for the night. After a season of complaining about the mix, I have to complement the sound crew for this week. The judges say it's his best performance yet, and that he's progressing as an artist. Mmmmm, I don't agree. "Jealous Guy" was much better. This may be second-best though, as he put some soul into it for a change.
Crystal Bowersox picked "No One Needs to Know" to drop a hint to her boyfriend about proposing. Is this the same guy she has the kid with? If so, seriously, just get hitched already. Crystal's the first contestant of the night to embrace the theme, as this is straight-up acoustic country, not pop. It's incredible: every week Crystal finds some way to stand out from the pack. As usual, she delivers the song perfectly, and the rest of the competition pales in comparison. While it may not have been one of her best from an artistic standpoint, I might call it one of my personal favorite Crystal performances. The first three judges say it wasn't their favorite, but she's so good it doesn't matter. Simon actually gives it a bad review, but we know that's because he doesn't like country music. Whatever. I'm allowed to disagree with the judges. I say it was another great job by the Bowersoxer (do I come up with clever nicknames or what?).
I can't believe he's still in the competition, but Aaron Kelly is up next with "You've Got a Way." There are some bad vocal moments (like, pretty much always), but Aaron gives it his best effort, and his glory note at the end is strong. My problem here is that this is sort of a boring song without much of a hook. However good his vocals may be, I'm not particularly interested in anything that's going on here. The judges think he did a great job, and Simon says he's improved after struggling the last two weeks. Maybe I'm just getting bored with Aaron, as all his performances pretty much feel like the same thing. The kid's a singer, not an artist, and there's only so much he's capable of doing with anything he sings. This might be the weakest of the night so far, though that's hardly an insult on a night when no one's really stunk.
Finally, Little Miss Weird, Siobhan Magnus, takes on Shania's first #1 country hit, "Any Man of Mine." Will it go over better than Mandisa's oust-inducing version from Season 5? Well, it starts out sounding like it'll be fun and upbeat, but Siobhan's vocals are tepid and the song feels like it's moving too slowly. Siobhan walks on the platform behind the judges to add some visual stimulation, but it comes across as robotic, and the only powerful moment is when she does her screechy glory note at the end. At last we have a performance worthy of being called "worst of the night." Can her fanbase, Vote For the Worst and the pimp spot save her? Now that I've trashed it, what do the judges think? Whaddayaknow? They all love it, even Simon! Kara also tells her she's "back." Wow. I have no words. This disconnect with reality is nothing short of surreal. Are they just desperate to keep another girl in the competition after the men have dominated the later stages the last two seasons?
My performance ranking:
Crystal (8.5/10)
Casey (7.5/10)
Michael (6.5/10)
Lee (6/10)
Aaron (5/10)
Siobhan (2/10)
Predictions:
Bottom 3: Aaron, Michael, Lee
Going home: Michael
Aaron seems like the obvious choice to go, since he would appear to have the least widespread appeal, and he's been in the Bottom 3 several times now. However, I'm picking Michael to go, since he went early and I'm having a hard time remembering his performance even after recalling I liked it. It's all so up-in-the-air right now that I feel like anyone could potentially go home, so I'll go with what I've got here.
Without Tim there was no one to vote for, which was good, because it meant I got to enjoy my rerun of LOST in peace! See you tomorrow!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Top 7 Results - Boring Us For Charity
Tonight is Idol Gives Back, and since I'm broke and have too many expenses of my own, I'm not able to contribute. I'll be watching this charity event and only taping the parts involving the Idols, since I couldn't care less about most of the acts they have performing. The big question though, is whether someone's actually getting eliminated tonight. As we all certainly remember, the last time Idol Gives Back was part of the results show they decided to skip the elimination and did an annoying double-elim the next week. It might be happening again, as this threat of elimination could be the only thing getting people to tune in.
Before I get to this recap I'm just going to get something out of the way up front: I wish these causes they're raising money for the best in their efforts. I'm not going to make snarky comments about helping the needy, since I believe private charity is the world's best hope. In the interest of staying classy here, I'll skip recapping the video packages showing us the people in need, since that stuff is obviously very serious. Everything else is fair game, so let's get to it!
The show opens with President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle reading a teleprompter message about how we can make a difference or some such cliche thing. Errrr...I'll stick no my unofficial no-politics policy on this blog and refrain from commenting further.
Our musical acts tonight are coming to us from Pasadena, where Queen Latifah is our mistress of ceremonies. I'll bet in the end I tape fewer than half these acts.
The Top 12 reunite for a group lip-synch of "Keeping the Dream Alive." The good news is that we get to see the lovely Paige Miles again. The bad news is that we have to see Andrew Garcia again. And uh, there's that whole lip-synching thing too. That kind of detracts from it.
Jonah Hill and Russell Brand are here to bring their brand of humor to a sketch about how they don't have the celebrity friends they promised for a celebrity phone bank. I don't get it. Is this supposed to be funny?
After some chat with the Idols we cut back to Queenie, who introduces the Black-Eyed Peas. All right! They suck! I can pause the tape!
Special guest George Lopez is here to help with eliminations...with a twist! Instead of dealing with the contestants he's going to judge the judges! Oh, the hilarity. This bit has a few chuckle-worthy lines, but most of it is hacky and contrived. He accuses them of "always" saying stuff that they rarely say (Randy hasn't said "pitchy" much this year, Simon rarely uses the term "rubbish," and I'm not sure I've ever heard Kara use the phrase he attributes to her), so it seems like a desperate attempt for a laugh. So much wasted potential.
The Ford video is set to "We've Got a Big Mess on Our Hands," and features all kinds of messes being made in the name of showing off 360-degree camera effects. You know, that money might've been better spent on charity.
Casey, Tim and Aaron were my Bottom 3 prediction, with Casey going home. Let's see how right I am as we actually start narrowing it down.
Crystal Bowersox and Casey James are asked to join Ryan at center stage. The person in the Bottom 3 is...Casey. Wow. Huge surprise there. Crystal may never see the Bottom 3 at the rate she's going.
Aaron Kelly and Lee DeWyze are next. One is in the Bottom 3, and it is...Aaron. Hey! Two for two!
Jeff Beck and Joss Stone backed by the Jubilation Choir are here to sing "I Put a Spell on You." Hmmmm. This might actually be worth taping, since Jeff Beck was a huge influence of Rick Nielsen. As expected, it's nothing earth-shattering, but given the acts they have booked it may turn out to be the best musical moment of the night.
Alicia Keys is here to perform some song I neither know nor care about, so I'm pausing the tape again. Hey, she's singing about how great New York is! On behalf of all of us here in flyover country: we don't want to hear about your stinking city. Halfway home! Must...hold...on...
Back to Jonah Hill and Russell Brand...still not funny. On the plus side, they managed to work Tatiana Del Toro into their attempted comedy bit. It's kind of sad that Tatiana's more talented than the idiots presenting it.
Speaking of actual talent, Carrie Underwood is here, singing some song about "Change." There ought to be a quota placed on that word after the 2008 Presidential Campaign. Sorry...no more politics. Of course, this song is tailor-made for a telethon, with lyrics about not changing the channel and giving to causes you see on TV. Well, I guess that clarifies their intentions, in case there was any confusion.
Wanda Sykes, AKA the most annoying woman in America, is here to give us a bit about how dumb it is to make contestants sing after they've been eliminated. How clever! I've never heard that angle before! Why doesn't this lady just go away and stop bothering people?
At long last it's results time again. Tim should be the final member of the Bottom 3, but hey, if he's safe I'll take it!
Siobhan Magnus is safe!
Michael Lynche is also safe, making Tim Urban the final member of our Bottom 3. Rats. Oh well. I'm glad to know the old predictive powers are still sharp (ah, who am I kidding, I got lucky). Hopefully I'll also be right about Casey leaving, since I want Tim to stay.
A band of All-Stars (including Randy Jackson and Mary J. Blige) is here to sing one of the most overrated songs ever, "Stairway to Heaven." Odd song choice, considering no one really knows what it's about. I guess it's a decent cover, but no one, not even Led Zeppelin themselves, has ever topped Rolf Harris' version.
Elton John is our final musical act, but before he can sing "Your Song" he makes sure to give us a PSA about getting tested for AIDS and using condoms. That advice is of absolutely no use to me, so...ha! Sir Elton sounds sort of Irish when he sings these days. I'm recording it because, well, it's Elton John, but this is actually kind of boring. Why does this thing have to go so long? It's way past the scheduled ending time!
At long last we're done with the music acts and we get to the final results. Will they be final though? I'm going to be angry if I wasted all this time for nothing. One person's going back to safety. It is...Aaron! Man. I'd never have pegged that kid for the Top 6. The one going home is...Tim! Dang it! Now who am I supposed to vote for? I'm actually surprised people vote for boring, unartistic Aaron over Tim. Tim can't stop smiling and laughing as he watches his rushed farewell video. Doggone it, this kid's likable. Why can't we keep him?
So after sitting through all that, we're finally done with this week. I can breathe a sigh of relief.
Power Rankings:
6. Aaron Kelly - He's clearly the weakest one left, so it's just a matter of time.
5. Casey James - Let's face it: he's plateauing.
4. Michael Lynche - Likability and OK-ness only take you so far.
3. Siobhan Magnus - She seems to have the fanbase to make the Top 3.
2. Lee DeWyze - Judging from his WNTS ratings he's clearly the guy to beat.
1. Crystal Bowersox - Can you honestly see any of these others winning the whole thing? If it's not Crystal, it'll probably be because someone else steps it up big time in the next few weeks.
See you next week, when Shania Twain mentors the Idols on her own songs! Too bad our buddy John Park left seven weeks ago!
Before I get to this recap I'm just going to get something out of the way up front: I wish these causes they're raising money for the best in their efforts. I'm not going to make snarky comments about helping the needy, since I believe private charity is the world's best hope. In the interest of staying classy here, I'll skip recapping the video packages showing us the people in need, since that stuff is obviously very serious. Everything else is fair game, so let's get to it!
The show opens with President Barack Obama and First Lady Michelle reading a teleprompter message about how we can make a difference or some such cliche thing. Errrr...I'll stick no my unofficial no-politics policy on this blog and refrain from commenting further.
Our musical acts tonight are coming to us from Pasadena, where Queen Latifah is our mistress of ceremonies. I'll bet in the end I tape fewer than half these acts.
The Top 12 reunite for a group lip-synch of "Keeping the Dream Alive." The good news is that we get to see the lovely Paige Miles again. The bad news is that we have to see Andrew Garcia again. And uh, there's that whole lip-synching thing too. That kind of detracts from it.
Jonah Hill and Russell Brand are here to bring their brand of humor to a sketch about how they don't have the celebrity friends they promised for a celebrity phone bank. I don't get it. Is this supposed to be funny?
After some chat with the Idols we cut back to Queenie, who introduces the Black-Eyed Peas. All right! They suck! I can pause the tape!
Special guest George Lopez is here to help with eliminations...with a twist! Instead of dealing with the contestants he's going to judge the judges! Oh, the hilarity. This bit has a few chuckle-worthy lines, but most of it is hacky and contrived. He accuses them of "always" saying stuff that they rarely say (Randy hasn't said "pitchy" much this year, Simon rarely uses the term "rubbish," and I'm not sure I've ever heard Kara use the phrase he attributes to her), so it seems like a desperate attempt for a laugh. So much wasted potential.
The Ford video is set to "We've Got a Big Mess on Our Hands," and features all kinds of messes being made in the name of showing off 360-degree camera effects. You know, that money might've been better spent on charity.
Casey, Tim and Aaron were my Bottom 3 prediction, with Casey going home. Let's see how right I am as we actually start narrowing it down.
Crystal Bowersox and Casey James are asked to join Ryan at center stage. The person in the Bottom 3 is...Casey. Wow. Huge surprise there. Crystal may never see the Bottom 3 at the rate she's going.
Aaron Kelly and Lee DeWyze are next. One is in the Bottom 3, and it is...Aaron. Hey! Two for two!
Jeff Beck and Joss Stone backed by the Jubilation Choir are here to sing "I Put a Spell on You." Hmmmm. This might actually be worth taping, since Jeff Beck was a huge influence of Rick Nielsen. As expected, it's nothing earth-shattering, but given the acts they have booked it may turn out to be the best musical moment of the night.
Alicia Keys is here to perform some song I neither know nor care about, so I'm pausing the tape again. Hey, she's singing about how great New York is! On behalf of all of us here in flyover country: we don't want to hear about your stinking city. Halfway home! Must...hold...on...
Back to Jonah Hill and Russell Brand...still not funny. On the plus side, they managed to work Tatiana Del Toro into their attempted comedy bit. It's kind of sad that Tatiana's more talented than the idiots presenting it.
Speaking of actual talent, Carrie Underwood is here, singing some song about "Change." There ought to be a quota placed on that word after the 2008 Presidential Campaign. Sorry...no more politics. Of course, this song is tailor-made for a telethon, with lyrics about not changing the channel and giving to causes you see on TV. Well, I guess that clarifies their intentions, in case there was any confusion.
Wanda Sykes, AKA the most annoying woman in America, is here to give us a bit about how dumb it is to make contestants sing after they've been eliminated. How clever! I've never heard that angle before! Why doesn't this lady just go away and stop bothering people?
At long last it's results time again. Tim should be the final member of the Bottom 3, but hey, if he's safe I'll take it!
Siobhan Magnus is safe!
Michael Lynche is also safe, making Tim Urban the final member of our Bottom 3. Rats. Oh well. I'm glad to know the old predictive powers are still sharp (ah, who am I kidding, I got lucky). Hopefully I'll also be right about Casey leaving, since I want Tim to stay.
A band of All-Stars (including Randy Jackson and Mary J. Blige) is here to sing one of the most overrated songs ever, "Stairway to Heaven." Odd song choice, considering no one really knows what it's about. I guess it's a decent cover, but no one, not even Led Zeppelin themselves, has ever topped Rolf Harris' version.
Elton John is our final musical act, but before he can sing "Your Song" he makes sure to give us a PSA about getting tested for AIDS and using condoms. That advice is of absolutely no use to me, so...ha! Sir Elton sounds sort of Irish when he sings these days. I'm recording it because, well, it's Elton John, but this is actually kind of boring. Why does this thing have to go so long? It's way past the scheduled ending time!
At long last we're done with the music acts and we get to the final results. Will they be final though? I'm going to be angry if I wasted all this time for nothing. One person's going back to safety. It is...Aaron! Man. I'd never have pegged that kid for the Top 6. The one going home is...Tim! Dang it! Now who am I supposed to vote for? I'm actually surprised people vote for boring, unartistic Aaron over Tim. Tim can't stop smiling and laughing as he watches his rushed farewell video. Doggone it, this kid's likable. Why can't we keep him?
So after sitting through all that, we're finally done with this week. I can breathe a sigh of relief.
Power Rankings:
6. Aaron Kelly - He's clearly the weakest one left, so it's just a matter of time.
5. Casey James - Let's face it: he's plateauing.
4. Michael Lynche - Likability and OK-ness only take you so far.
3. Siobhan Magnus - She seems to have the fanbase to make the Top 3.
2. Lee DeWyze - Judging from his WNTS ratings he's clearly the guy to beat.
1. Crystal Bowersox - Can you honestly see any of these others winning the whole thing? If it's not Crystal, it'll probably be because someone else steps it up big time in the next few weeks.
See you next week, when Shania Twain mentors the Idols on her own songs! Too bad our buddy John Park left seven weeks ago!
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Top 7 - Off Keys
It's Idol Gives Back week, so you know what that means! Inspirational songs! Tonight we'll be left breathless by our Idols, as they...ah forget it. I'll spoil it now: We're in for a night of good-but-not-great.
Our mentor is Alicia Keys, whose philanthropy and generosity has won the world over, according to Seacrest. I wonder if tomorrow she'll bring out another kid to sing about how he's the world's greatest?
Leading off is Casey James, with Fleetwood Mac's "Don't Stop (Thinking About Tomorrow)." Once again, the vocals are pretty high in the mix, exposing the fact that Casey isn't the greatest technical singer. Then again, who on this season really is? He sings it all right and even includes a guitar solo for good measure. I guess my biggest problem is that there's nothing about this performance that really stands out. It's just Casey doing his thing competently. No big whoop. Randy accuses him of doing the same thing every week, and Simon goes even farther, trashing it completely. Hmmmmm. He could be in trouble after going first tonight.
Lee DeWyze picked Simon and Garfunkel's "The Boxer" because it inspired him to play the guitar, and this is inspiration week. Alicia tells us that if Lee can bring people into him, then he'll make them feel something. Please, Alicia! This is a family show! Maybe he's too "in his head," because Lee's vocals tonight are pretty weak, and his natural gruff tone doesn't go well with the softness of the song. I'm hearing out-of-key notes all over the place. This is probably his worst performance yet. In an apparent attempt to discredit my ears, the judges think it was incredible. Ellen calls it his best performance, and Simon says he had a "moment." Wow. I didn't like his voice on it at all. Oh well. I guess he's probably staying, then. Go Illinois!
Tim Urban, the only one left who hasn't gotten the pimp spot, takes on the Goo Goo Dolls' "Better Days." As usual, the bum notes are there, and his belting just doesn't work. The parts within his range sound really nice though. I'll confess a lack of familiarity with this song, but it's got a nice melody, which is mainly what I look for. It wasn't Tim's best, but I'd say it was OK. The judges are all a bit underwhelmed by the whole thing. Simon essentially tells Tim the bar has been raised for him, and that it was no longer up to par. Ah, the perils of improving.
There's nothing like a good old cliche song choice, and Aaron Kelly is here to provide us with one! Run for cover, it's R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly," which Aaron's been singing since he was five! I wonder if he went to see Space Jam in theaters and first heard this song there like I did? Aaron's usual awkwardness is there early on, but it eventually turns into one of his best performances, much to my surprise. I guess singing a song for so many years can work to your advantage. Unlike Tim, his belting actually sounds powerful, and this uplifting schlock is perfectly suited for the little cheeseball. Yeah, his voice is still wavery on the big notes, but by now we can chalk it up to Aaron being Aaron. The judges commend him for doing well on such a big song, and only Simon tells him it wasn't very good. Ah, whatever. Maybe I'm so desperate to be entertained that I'm willing to be charitable.
Tonight! Siobhan Magnus is taking on two of the singers you're allegedly never supposed to sing on this show! Whitney and Mariah! (Divas only need one name, beyotch! See also: Aretha and Celine.) The song, of course, is "When You Believe." Hey, Celtic Woman sang this song on their latest PBS special! Maybe that's Siobhan's next stop with her Irish name and all. She just needs to get those tattoos removed. Well, about Siobhan's performance...it's nicely sung for the most part. She kind of looks like she wants to cry at times. When it picks up and she goes into her upper register it sounds a little nasal, but the falsetto note when the song finishes its climax sounds perfect, providing a good ending. Ellen likes it, but the other judges think it wasn't up to the Siobhan standard. Sheesh. Why does it seem like I often like performances the judges don't, and vice versa? Am I a complete dunderhead? Wait...don't answer that.
Michael Lynche is here to bore-rock us with "Hero." Just to be clear, that's the Chad Kroeger song, not the Mariah Carey one. He's going with the acoustic guitar again, so we know we're probably not going to see anything new here. I've never been a big fan of this song either, so that's another strike against him. Michael sounds good, but the whole thing is just a big old bowl of average. This isn't something I'll remember tomorrow. The first two judges think it was OK, but Kara doesn't like it, and Simon can't get past the Spiderman connection. He also says it felt artificial. Shoot, the entire bore-rock genre feels artificial if you ask me.
So it's up to Crystal Bowersox to blow the rest of the contestants off the stage again, this time with "People Get Ready" as her weapon of choice. As Ryan notes, Crystal's going without an instrument for the first time this season. Remember two years ago when using instruments was a huge new deal? Now it's practically expected for contestants who want to be taken seriously. She begins a cappella and never misses a note. When the music joins in, she continues flawlessly. How does she do it? It's like she's invincible or something! She loses it vocally at the end, but it's because she's feeling the song so much that she starts crying. Now that's a "moment," judges, not what Lee did. The judges shower her with praise, and Randy even gives her a standing ovation. I think this may go down as the performance of the season! Well done, Crystal.
My performance ranking:
Crystal (9.5/10)
Siobhan (6/10)
Aaron (5.6/10)
Casey (5.5/10)
Michael (5/10)
Tim (4/10)
Lee (1.5/10)
Predictions:
Bottom 3: Casey, Tim, Aaron
Going Home: Casey
I sort of picked the Bottom 3 by default, as the rest I think were either too good (Crystal), have too big a fanbase (Siobhan and Michael) or were too praised (Lee). I have Casey leaving because he went first, was less memorable than the other two, and doesn't have a fanbase that's worried about his safety, as he hasn't yet appeared in the Bottom 3. Will he actually be eliminated on the night of goodwill that is Idol Gives Back? We shall see!
Our mentor is Alicia Keys, whose philanthropy and generosity has won the world over, according to Seacrest. I wonder if tomorrow she'll bring out another kid to sing about how he's the world's greatest?
Leading off is Casey James, with Fleetwood Mac's "Don't Stop (Thinking About Tomorrow)." Once again, the vocals are pretty high in the mix, exposing the fact that Casey isn't the greatest technical singer. Then again, who on this season really is? He sings it all right and even includes a guitar solo for good measure. I guess my biggest problem is that there's nothing about this performance that really stands out. It's just Casey doing his thing competently. No big whoop. Randy accuses him of doing the same thing every week, and Simon goes even farther, trashing it completely. Hmmmmm. He could be in trouble after going first tonight.
Lee DeWyze picked Simon and Garfunkel's "The Boxer" because it inspired him to play the guitar, and this is inspiration week. Alicia tells us that if Lee can bring people into him, then he'll make them feel something. Please, Alicia! This is a family show! Maybe he's too "in his head," because Lee's vocals tonight are pretty weak, and his natural gruff tone doesn't go well with the softness of the song. I'm hearing out-of-key notes all over the place. This is probably his worst performance yet. In an apparent attempt to discredit my ears, the judges think it was incredible. Ellen calls it his best performance, and Simon says he had a "moment." Wow. I didn't like his voice on it at all. Oh well. I guess he's probably staying, then. Go Illinois!
Tim Urban, the only one left who hasn't gotten the pimp spot, takes on the Goo Goo Dolls' "Better Days." As usual, the bum notes are there, and his belting just doesn't work. The parts within his range sound really nice though. I'll confess a lack of familiarity with this song, but it's got a nice melody, which is mainly what I look for. It wasn't Tim's best, but I'd say it was OK. The judges are all a bit underwhelmed by the whole thing. Simon essentially tells Tim the bar has been raised for him, and that it was no longer up to par. Ah, the perils of improving.
There's nothing like a good old cliche song choice, and Aaron Kelly is here to provide us with one! Run for cover, it's R. Kelly's "I Believe I Can Fly," which Aaron's been singing since he was five! I wonder if he went to see Space Jam in theaters and first heard this song there like I did? Aaron's usual awkwardness is there early on, but it eventually turns into one of his best performances, much to my surprise. I guess singing a song for so many years can work to your advantage. Unlike Tim, his belting actually sounds powerful, and this uplifting schlock is perfectly suited for the little cheeseball. Yeah, his voice is still wavery on the big notes, but by now we can chalk it up to Aaron being Aaron. The judges commend him for doing well on such a big song, and only Simon tells him it wasn't very good. Ah, whatever. Maybe I'm so desperate to be entertained that I'm willing to be charitable.
Tonight! Siobhan Magnus is taking on two of the singers you're allegedly never supposed to sing on this show! Whitney and Mariah! (Divas only need one name, beyotch! See also: Aretha and Celine.) The song, of course, is "When You Believe." Hey, Celtic Woman sang this song on their latest PBS special! Maybe that's Siobhan's next stop with her Irish name and all. She just needs to get those tattoos removed. Well, about Siobhan's performance...it's nicely sung for the most part. She kind of looks like she wants to cry at times. When it picks up and she goes into her upper register it sounds a little nasal, but the falsetto note when the song finishes its climax sounds perfect, providing a good ending. Ellen likes it, but the other judges think it wasn't up to the Siobhan standard. Sheesh. Why does it seem like I often like performances the judges don't, and vice versa? Am I a complete dunderhead? Wait...don't answer that.
Michael Lynche is here to bore-rock us with "Hero." Just to be clear, that's the Chad Kroeger song, not the Mariah Carey one. He's going with the acoustic guitar again, so we know we're probably not going to see anything new here. I've never been a big fan of this song either, so that's another strike against him. Michael sounds good, but the whole thing is just a big old bowl of average. This isn't something I'll remember tomorrow. The first two judges think it was OK, but Kara doesn't like it, and Simon can't get past the Spiderman connection. He also says it felt artificial. Shoot, the entire bore-rock genre feels artificial if you ask me.
So it's up to Crystal Bowersox to blow the rest of the contestants off the stage again, this time with "People Get Ready" as her weapon of choice. As Ryan notes, Crystal's going without an instrument for the first time this season. Remember two years ago when using instruments was a huge new deal? Now it's practically expected for contestants who want to be taken seriously. She begins a cappella and never misses a note. When the music joins in, she continues flawlessly. How does she do it? It's like she's invincible or something! She loses it vocally at the end, but it's because she's feeling the song so much that she starts crying. Now that's a "moment," judges, not what Lee did. The judges shower her with praise, and Randy even gives her a standing ovation. I think this may go down as the performance of the season! Well done, Crystal.
My performance ranking:
Crystal (9.5/10)
Siobhan (6/10)
Aaron (5.6/10)
Casey (5.5/10)
Michael (5/10)
Tim (4/10)
Lee (1.5/10)
Predictions:
Bottom 3: Casey, Tim, Aaron
Going Home: Casey
I sort of picked the Bottom 3 by default, as the rest I think were either too good (Crystal), have too big a fanbase (Siobhan and Michael) or were too praised (Lee). I have Casey leaving because he went first, was less memorable than the other two, and doesn't have a fanbase that's worried about his safety, as he hasn't yet appeared in the Bottom 3. Will he actually be eliminated on the night of goodwill that is Idol Gives Back? We shall see!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Top 9 (ii) Results - Two For the Road
To open the show tonight we get yet another recap of last week's oh-so-dramatic results where Mike Lynche was saved. I'll say it again, Idol producers: No one likes the Judges' Save. No one. That save last week was about as dramatic as Super Bowl XX. My brother, who claims to hate this show and only barely follows it, saw that save coming a mile away. Just shut up about it already and stop trying to pretend that your result-screwing idea has any merit whatsoever.
Now that that rant's out of the way, we get to celebrate a return to normalcy with an Elvis medley. Oh, come on. They did the same thing in Season 5 and it was one of the best ever! To their credit though, they don't just recycle the songs from that medley. This ones includes: "Burnin' Love" (used in the S5 medley), "Teddy Bear," "Return to Sender" and "Viva Las Legas" (all not used in S5). This one's a lot cheesier than the first, but hey, they manage to make it fun. And isn't it so dang cute seeing Tim, Aaron and Michael tell the girls they want to be their teddy bear?
The Ford video is set to a song called "Light and Day/Reach For the Sun" and the theme is "going green." I'm not into this.
Dim the lights, we're getting our first elimination now!
Casey James, Aaron Kelly and Andrew Garcia all stand up and are directed to center stage. After some dawdling, the one leaving is...Andrew! Finally! America's gotten sufficiently tired of Ol' Necktat! Since they get to choose their elimination songs this year, Andrew leaves us with "You Give Me Something." He still sounds mediocre. Why did anyone think he was so good in the first place? Well, now I have to find someone else to root against each week. I don't really dislike any of the remaining contestants. I guess Casey and Aaron are safe, so that's one of my two predictions correct. The other contestant I had leaving was Tim, but I hope I'm wrong on that one!
We see a video of Elliott Yamin and Kara making a trip to Africa for Idol Gives Back. That's an odd match, since Kara wasn't judging the show back when Elliott was on. At least when he went with Fantasia they had the common experience of being contestants. Whatever. It's nice to see them making a better life for these kids. Some of the confirmed guests for IGB are The Black-Eyed Peas, Jeff Beck, Joss Stone, Mary J. Blige, Elton John and probably some others I missed but don't care enough to go back and check. Nothing exciting there. I hope IGB is successful in its efforts, but I won't be contributing, as I'm broke right now.
Brooke White's back with some guy named Justin Gaston to perform an Elvis song, we're told. Apparently this Justin guy is the star of a web series called If I Can Dream. Say, do you think...? Whattaya know? That's the Elvis song they're performing! Well, it's nice to see my girl Brooke again. This web series kid means nothing to me. You just know someone paid big bucks to promote that series because this week made a perfect tie-in. My brother isn't familiar with Brooke, and he comments that she looks like Alex from Lost. That's funny. I guess with that bony face Brooke could pass for a blond version of Rousseau's daughter.
For the next round of cuts, the entire bottom row is asked to join Ryan on the stage.
After recapping each performance we learn that Crystal Bowersox is safe! Well, duh.
Siobhan Magnus is also safe!
Lee DeWyze is safe!
That leaves us with Katie Stevens, Michael Lynche and Tim Urban. One of them is the next to leave us! Please let me be wrong about Tim! Before we find out though, it's time for Adam Lambert to take the stage with his new song "Whataya Want From Me." This song is nothing special, but it's nice to hear a guest performer with no autotune for a change. What else to say? Ummm...I got nothing. Let's just get to the results.
First back to safety is...Tim!!! Whoo! I was wrong! Go Timmy Boy! Now it's down to Michael and Katie. Ryan tells us that the safe contestant wasn't even in the Bottom 3. Oh, for crying out loud. Obviously it's Katie going home, then. Michael undoubtedly got a ton of extra support from his fans who don't want to see him leave after last week's close call. Yep, Katie's out. It's a shame it came after one of her best performances. She sings us home with "Let it Be," but she's so choked up that she's off-pitch and nasal the entire time. We forgive you, Katie. You're at the peak of your popularity right now, so enjoy the last few moments of it.
In what was supposed to be a girl's year the guys currently outnumber the girls five to two. Let's see how the remaining seven stack up in my book.
Power Rankings:
7. Aaron Kelly - He had the Bottom 3 bounce this week, so next week is probably the end for him.
6. Tim Urban - Improving, but not as favored as the other five. He'll likely get thrown under the bus.
5. Michael Lynche - He's not interesting enough to go too much deeper. Maybe fourth place, but that'd probably be it.
4. Casey James - If he were more consistently on top of his game I might see him as a real contender.
3. Siobhan Magnus - There's still hope for her to turn things around, but it's hard to envision her winning this thing.
2. Lee DeWyze - The most talented male, but America probably won't want to crown another David Cook just two years after the first one.
1. Crystal Bowersox - She's the only one with the right combination of talent and difference from past winners to win...I think.
Next week is Idol Gives Back, which means the dreaded "Inspirational Songs" theme is returning. Will we be getting a separate results show on Thursday, or are they going to combine the votes from the next two weeks for a double elimination? I'm not sure, but I care not who leaveth as long as it be not Tim!
Now that that rant's out of the way, we get to celebrate a return to normalcy with an Elvis medley. Oh, come on. They did the same thing in Season 5 and it was one of the best ever! To their credit though, they don't just recycle the songs from that medley. This ones includes: "Burnin' Love" (used in the S5 medley), "Teddy Bear," "Return to Sender" and "Viva Las Legas" (all not used in S5). This one's a lot cheesier than the first, but hey, they manage to make it fun. And isn't it so dang cute seeing Tim, Aaron and Michael tell the girls they want to be their teddy bear?
The Ford video is set to a song called "Light and Day/Reach For the Sun" and the theme is "going green." I'm not into this.
Dim the lights, we're getting our first elimination now!
Casey James, Aaron Kelly and Andrew Garcia all stand up and are directed to center stage. After some dawdling, the one leaving is...Andrew! Finally! America's gotten sufficiently tired of Ol' Necktat! Since they get to choose their elimination songs this year, Andrew leaves us with "You Give Me Something." He still sounds mediocre. Why did anyone think he was so good in the first place? Well, now I have to find someone else to root against each week. I don't really dislike any of the remaining contestants. I guess Casey and Aaron are safe, so that's one of my two predictions correct. The other contestant I had leaving was Tim, but I hope I'm wrong on that one!
We see a video of Elliott Yamin and Kara making a trip to Africa for Idol Gives Back. That's an odd match, since Kara wasn't judging the show back when Elliott was on. At least when he went with Fantasia they had the common experience of being contestants. Whatever. It's nice to see them making a better life for these kids. Some of the confirmed guests for IGB are The Black-Eyed Peas, Jeff Beck, Joss Stone, Mary J. Blige, Elton John and probably some others I missed but don't care enough to go back and check. Nothing exciting there. I hope IGB is successful in its efforts, but I won't be contributing, as I'm broke right now.
Brooke White's back with some guy named Justin Gaston to perform an Elvis song, we're told. Apparently this Justin guy is the star of a web series called If I Can Dream. Say, do you think...? Whattaya know? That's the Elvis song they're performing! Well, it's nice to see my girl Brooke again. This web series kid means nothing to me. You just know someone paid big bucks to promote that series because this week made a perfect tie-in. My brother isn't familiar with Brooke, and he comments that she looks like Alex from Lost. That's funny. I guess with that bony face Brooke could pass for a blond version of Rousseau's daughter.
For the next round of cuts, the entire bottom row is asked to join Ryan on the stage.
After recapping each performance we learn that Crystal Bowersox is safe! Well, duh.
Siobhan Magnus is also safe!
Lee DeWyze is safe!
That leaves us with Katie Stevens, Michael Lynche and Tim Urban. One of them is the next to leave us! Please let me be wrong about Tim! Before we find out though, it's time for Adam Lambert to take the stage with his new song "Whataya Want From Me." This song is nothing special, but it's nice to hear a guest performer with no autotune for a change. What else to say? Ummm...I got nothing. Let's just get to the results.
First back to safety is...Tim!!! Whoo! I was wrong! Go Timmy Boy! Now it's down to Michael and Katie. Ryan tells us that the safe contestant wasn't even in the Bottom 3. Oh, for crying out loud. Obviously it's Katie going home, then. Michael undoubtedly got a ton of extra support from his fans who don't want to see him leave after last week's close call. Yep, Katie's out. It's a shame it came after one of her best performances. She sings us home with "Let it Be," but she's so choked up that she's off-pitch and nasal the entire time. We forgive you, Katie. You're at the peak of your popularity right now, so enjoy the last few moments of it.
In what was supposed to be a girl's year the guys currently outnumber the girls five to two. Let's see how the remaining seven stack up in my book.
Power Rankings:
7. Aaron Kelly - He had the Bottom 3 bounce this week, so next week is probably the end for him.
6. Tim Urban - Improving, but not as favored as the other five. He'll likely get thrown under the bus.
5. Michael Lynche - He's not interesting enough to go too much deeper. Maybe fourth place, but that'd probably be it.
4. Casey James - If he were more consistently on top of his game I might see him as a real contender.
3. Siobhan Magnus - There's still hope for her to turn things around, but it's hard to envision her winning this thing.
2. Lee DeWyze - The most talented male, but America probably won't want to crown another David Cook just two years after the first one.
1. Crystal Bowersox - She's the only one with the right combination of talent and difference from past winners to win...I think.
Next week is Idol Gives Back, which means the dreaded "Inspirational Songs" theme is returning. Will we be getting a separate results show on Thursday, or are they going to combine the votes from the next two weeks for a double elimination? I'm not sure, but I care not who leaveth as long as it be not Tim!
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