Top 11 Results - I Was Suicidal 'Cause You Was My Idol

After an unnecessarily melodramatic opening that tells us what we already know (Someone has to go home tonight and it's really tough on the contestants! You don't say!), we're treated to a fun 'n cheesy group number! The song? Wham!'s "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go!" Now that's a cornball-tastic choice I should in theory fully support! While I did laugh a few times (especially at Didi, Crystal and Paige fanning themselves on the line "it's warm in bed"), the abomination known as autotune reared its ugly head and dampened the experience. Seriously. I don't want to hear a robot singing a song. I want to hear voices. Why doesn't someone just audition with autotune if it's going to be added to the song anyway?

The Ford video is set to "Our Time Now" and has the Idols frolicking in a fountain full of plastic balls. In the end Andrew gets left behind because he was buried too deep. We can only hope that tonight's results mirror the events of the Ford video.

My predictions were a Bottom 3 of Paige, Aaron and Andrew, with Aaron going home. Not many people were predicting that result, so if it turns out to be right I'll look like a genius. If I'm wrong, hey, my two readers can mock me.

Siobhan Magnus is safe! No surprise.

Lee DeWyze and Casey James both stand up.

Tim Urban and Paige Miles both stand up, and they're both in the Bottom 3! Well I got one right! What's the deal with Lee and Casey though? And what about Aaron, Andrew, Crystal, Didi, Katie and Michael? I guess we'll find out after...Miley Cyrus performs! (cue applause)

Wow, I didn't know this kid could play the piano. Of course, I know very little about Miley Cyrus. It's apparently her new song, called "When I Look at You." I've already forgotten how it goes the second it ends. She comes across like a precocious kid playing grown-up in her chat with Ryan afterwards. I guess that's standard teen girl behavior, right?

More results! Apparently Casey and Lee are safe! Hey, now that Casey's in the Top 10 we can find out what his super-secret pre-show ritual is! (Yeah, I don't care either.)

Aaron Kelly is safe! Dang it! Well there goes my out-of-left-field prediction! Not that I have a problem with Aaron, I just like being right.

Didi Benami is safe!

Michael Lynche is safe, just like his performance last night!

Crystal Bowersox is safe!

That leaves us with Katie Stevens and Andrew Garcia! Based on last night it should definitely be Andrew, but who knows what'll happen on this crazy show? The final member of the Bottom 3 is...Katie! Andrew, I hope you get down on your knees and thank the producers of American Idol for gift-wrapping a spot on the tour for you. You did little to earn it.

So my predictions this week weren't that good. Sue me. The first person back to safety is...Katie. Well, they didn't make her sweat very long, did they? Paige and Tim aren't so lucky. They have to sweat it out longer as well as sit through a performance by Joe Jonas and Demi Lovato. You know, if they'd stuck with the "teen idols" theme this results show would've made a lot more sense.

The two Disney kids sing an inspirational duet called "Make a Wave," and it's more like a melisma contest than an actual duet. That Demi knows how to wring out every last note! This segment is fairly short, since they know we're only watching to see who goes home.

So the person with the unenviable position of going through the Judges' Save theatrics is...Paige. Well, after her What Not to Sing preliminary rating ended up at 3 (out of 100, for those of you unfamiliar), I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Simon decides to spare us the theatrics and tells Paige up front that they aren't going to save her. Good call, Simon! You should do that every week! Since Paige gets to choose her singout song, she goes with "All Right Now." She doesn't sound that great, but that's to be expected with all the emotion and sickness she's dealing with. See you later, Paige! I knew you had no chance of winning, but for what it's worth, I thought you were better-looking than any of the remaining girls!

Power Rankings:

10. Andrew Garcia - Probably just wishful thinking, but he's done nothing but stink up the joint ever since the auditions (I'm on the "'Straight Up' Was Massively Overrated" bandwagon). This can't keep going on, can it?

9. Tim Urban - I love it when a bottom-feeder contestant outlasts an early favorite. It's always funny to look at it in the context of the expectations at the beginning of the competition. Here's hoping Tim outlasts Andrew.

8. Katie Stevens - Making the Bottom 3 doesn't bode well for her future, and her talent doesn't suggest she should go much farther.

7. Aaron Kelly - Whatever.

6. Casey James - I think the coasting starts soon.

5. Michael Lynche - He's just an OK singer with a fun personality. It can keep you around a while, but late in the game you need to be much better.

4. Siobhan Magnus - Her shrieking is getting old already. If anything, I think she's more likely to fall short of this prediction than to surpass it.

3. Crystal Bowersox - If Melinda Doolittle can go home here, so can Crystal.

2. Lee DeWyze - I see more potential in him than any of the other guys, and one of the men has to go far in this thing.

1. Didi Benami - Yeah, yeah, I know a lot of people didn't like her this week, but for now I still have her as my dark horse that rises up and snatches the title.

Next week's theme is R&B/Soul with Usher as mentor. I see some trainwrecks on the horizon!