Top 16 Results Recap

After tonight the hope of losing four disliked contestants a week is over. That's right, the Top 12 are being named. Ryan opens the show by announcing that four are going home, but first...Blake Lewis! Oh goody. I can save some space on my tape. Blake sings his new song "How Many Words", and his singing hasn't improved since last season, nor has his beatboxing gotten less annoying. You know, this song might actually be good if it were sung by someone with talent. When they talk to Blake afterwards he still comes off like a smug dirtbag. Fortunately they get him out of the way early.

Finally it's time to announce the Top 12. I guess they're not doing a cheesy group number this week. Aw, man. I always like that part. Once again, thanks for ruining the fun, Blake!

David Cook is up first. Ryan tells us Lionel Richie himself said he loved David's version of "Hello". After that ringing endorsement, we learn David's in the Top 12. No surprise there. David Archuleta is next. Why must we go through this charade? We all know he's going to be in. After Ryan tells us what we already knew, David wheezes his way over to the silver stools. Jason Castro is next. I know I predicted he'd go home, but I knew he'd be safe as soon as I went on the internet and read the overwhelmingly positive discussion of his performance. Sure enough, he's in the Top 12.

Now it's time to go over to the girls. Brooke White is first. This looks good for her. Sure enough, she's in. Yes! Syesha Mercado, who I was hoping would be the "shocker", is also in. Dang it! Kady Malloy is going home, but we all saw that coming. Apparently they're each getting their own special boot video this year rather than one for all four of them. Kady is clearly choked up as she sings "Who Wants to Live Forever" one last time and Asia'h and Ramiele cry for her.

After the break Ryan tells us that for the first time they'll allow viewers to call in live during results shows. Somewhere Captain Janks is hatching a plan.

Back to the guys. David Hernandez is in. I guess the stripper scandal didn't hurt him. It's going to be hard keeping all three Davids straight (no pun intended). Michael Johns is in. No surprise there, even though he hasn't really lived up to the hype in this competition yet. Luke Menard is next, and we all know what's coming. Yep, he's out. In his interview video he specifically says he wants to be the next American Idol, but I guess the powers that be just wouldn't stand for it. I would've liked to see you win, Luke. Good luck with your future. His sing-out of "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" sounds a lot better to my ears than his original performance did. His voice actually doesn't sound like it's being drowned out by the band this time. Did they give him a bad mix to sabotage him? Who knows? It wouldn't surprise me. Chikezie and Danny Noriega are left on the couches, and we all know Danny's going to make it, since he's being set up as a "villain" like Sanjaya last year.

Back to the girls. Ramiele Malubay is in the Top 12! Phew! I was worried that her hackneyed song choice would do her in, but her fans pulled through. Carly Smithson is in, of course. Amanda Overmyer, who a lot of us figured would be going home last week, is in. It's down to Kristy Lee Cook and Asia'h Epperson. Oh man. I think Asia'h's going home, simply because it'll be more "shocking" when she loses next to the boring Kristy. Randy says he thinks Asia'h's going to make the Top 12, Paula says they're both great (of course), and Simon says he thinks Asia'h's going home. America voted and...Asia'h is going home! Aw man. I'm not a big Asia'h fan, but she's a lot more entertaining than the mannequin! Seriously, who's voting for Kristy, and more importantly, why? Asia'h is clearly disappointed, but she maintains her composure long enough to give us a good sing-out. Even in elimination Asia'h shows so much more talent and personality than Kristy does.

Now it's back to the two remaining guys, who've had to sweat it out long enough. If Danny goes home I'll be shocked at this point. All over the internet everyone was predicting Chikezie would go while talking about how funny Danny's personality was. Ryan tells Chikezie that he can have a seat, because he's in the Top 12! What?? Danny's gone?? I don't believe this! This is great! Sorry, but I really wanted one of my initial favorite guys to make the Top 12, especially after Luke got eliminated. Luke and Jason Yeager couldn't do it, but with Chikezie I can still root for one of them in this competition! I think Chikezie has a lot more talent than he's shown us so far, and now he has the chance to prove it to America. Anyway, Danny languidly sings "Tainted Love" one more time before we say goodbye to the sideshow that is him. He can't hold a candle to Sanjaya.

Now that we know the Top 12, I'd like to add a feature to this blog I'll call "Power Rankings" (very creative name, I know). I'll list all the Finalists in the order I think they're most likely to finish based on what we've seen. After every Results Show the Power Rankings will be updated. Obviously, it's hard to foresee who'll struggle and who'll grow throughout the competition, but I'll do my best to predict how fanbases, trends, vote-splitting and such will affect the results.

Here's how I see it right now:

12. Kristy Lee Cook
11. Amanda Overmyer
10. David Hernandez
9. Chikezie
8. Syesha Mercado
7. Michael Johns
6. Carly Smithson
5. Ramiele Malubay
4. Jason Castro
3. David Cook
2. Brooke White
1. David Archuleta

I'll admit that Brooke and David A. could split the Mormon vote, but right now I think they're the two most likable contestants of each gender, so they'll probably be getting plenty of votes from all over America. David C. is getting a lot of buzz right now, so I could see him in the finale as well, but having two Davids would be weird and I have yet to see David C. succeed in anything other than his comfortable rock genre. There's also the possibility, which many have mentioned, that David A. is peaking too early, but I think he has a big enough fanbase right now that he'll be able to overcome some missteps along the way.

I'm still not fully convinced that this is the most talented Top 12 ever, but there are definitely some good people in this group. I'd say the talent is almost there, but the likability doesn't come close. Not many of them have personalities that make you really want to see them succeed. Whatever happens, I hope this season will be as interesting as last year's. When it's all over we'll be able to look back at these predictions and have a good laugh at how wrong they were (or be amazed at how right, but I doubt it).

Next week the Top 12 will be singing songs from the Lennon-McCartney songbook. Hopefully they won't butcher them too badly.