Top 7 Results Again - If This Show Had a Foot It'd Be Bleeding Right Now

So once again we have seven people, and this time we're saying goodbye to two of them. I hate double eliminations. They're double the stress.

Ryan tells us they'll be using green power at the finale. Why don't they always use it if it's so great? Don't you want to help the environment, "Idol"?

We find out why Paula was "with Lil this week" and able to comment on her vocal rest: She choreographed the group number! We see a clip of their session together, and she works those Idols hard. Hmmm, apparently Allison is bigger than Lil. I guess Allison seems smaller to me because of her youth while Lil seems bigger to me because of her maturity. Does that make sense? Does anyone care about my thoughts on how perception of physical size relates to age and maturity? I didn't think so. Matt downloads his version of "Let's Get it On" as a ringtone. Those kids just don't want to work to entertain us!

So was their effort worth it? You bet! Their song is The Jacksons' "Shake Your Body (Down to the Ground)," and we see some high-quality dancing this time. My brother comments that it's a good thing Scott was eliminated, since he wouldn't have been able to do this. It appears the lip-synching is back, but they do have headset mics to go with their sunglasses and disco outfits. This is actually a lot of fun. Paula hasn't lost her choreographer's touch. The Idols give her a large bouquet at the end of the performance. It was almost surreal to see such a complex production, but I liked it.

When we get back from the commercial the camera focuses on a sign in the audience that says "Vegans [Heart] Simon." Huh? What was the purpose of that? Is "Earth Day" really code for "Hippie Tree Hugger Stereotype Day"?

The Ford video is set to "I'm Good, I'm Gone." I've never heard the original to this song, nor do I care to. It shows them working regular jobs, and after the workday is over they all head into a club advertising for singers. Oh, I get it. They're saying that these Idols were all meant to sing, even if they have to do other stuff to pay the bills. Whatever.

Results time.

Lil Rounds stands up first. She has to walk to the far side of the stage. Ryan tells her how brave and unafraid to speak her mind she is, then tells her that her journey is over. Spout time! She does "I'm Every Woman" again and it's just as uninteresting as the first time. It's nice that we've finally put Lil out of her (OK, our) misery. The drama between her and the judges was getting old. Paula tells Lil she sounded better than last night, and says it was good for her to go out on top of her game. Randy says it's just the beginning for her. Somewhere LaToya London, Vonzell Solomon, Paris Bennett and Syesha Mercado are laughing. Simon says he'll miss her family screaming. Kara says some puffy crap that isn't worth recapping. Why can't we vote her off?

My streak of losing someone I don't care about continues. Kris, Allison, Adam and Anoop are still alive. I really hope one of them isn't leaving next.

Now it's time for a disco medley featuring the legends themselves. Freda Payne sings "Band of Gold," Thelma Houston sings "Don't Leave Me This Way" and K.C. of Sunshine Band fame sings "Get Down Tonight." All three have voices past their primes, since I doubt any of them kept performing after the disco era ended. Thelma tries a little too hard to be sexy, and K.C. has to bring four female dancers onstage with him to help us forget that he's not all that visually appealing. I guess if you need filler you could do worse than to honor the performers for whom the much-maligned disco genre was their livelihood.

More results.

Kris Allen is safe! Whoo! Kris is in the Top 5! Four more weeks to go!

Adam Lambert is safe, which is a no-brainer.

Danny Gokey is safe. Sorry, Becky (and all of America)!

Anoop Desai is in the Bottom 3. I guess Lil was at the bottom of the Bottom 3.

So who's joining Anoop? Allison Iraheta or Matt Giraud? There's some talking before we find out Allison's in the Bottom 3. Dang it! Now one of my favorites is going home! I'm sure Matt's a nice guy, but he totally doesn't deserve to be in the Top 5. First the judges invite him back for the Wild Card after bombing in the Semifinals, then they put him in the Top 13 after a Wild Card performance that had an obnoxious number of runs and then they give him a reprieve when he totally deserved to go home in the Top 7. Sorry, Matt, but you're pretty much the symbol of everything that's wrong with this season. You're nothing more than the judges' pampered pet. If the judges are the U.S. government, you're AIG. If it were up to me we'd be preparing for an Anoop-Allison-Adam-Danny-Kris Top 5. Instead, Matt has to be there. Either Anoop or Allison is going to get screwed out of a spot in the Top 5 because of the judges propping up the Giraud kid.

Time for David Archuleta to sing his new song "Don't Touch My Hand." Um...he shakes hands with the girls in the audience, um...eh, I'm bored now. I got nothing. The song ends and I've already forgotten how it goes. Good luck to David, but I don't see myself supporting his career. After the performance he tells our Bottom 2-dwellers that even though it's ending for one of them tonight, they're going to get a bunch of opportunities because of this experience. Even if David's music isn't my thing, I can appreciate his genuine niceness.

So one of these two is going home. As much as I like Anoop, if I have to choose between these two I'd rather keep Allison. The one going home is...Anoop. Phew! Allison is safe! It's OK, Anoop. You're Top 5 in my mind. Matt Giraud is still the 7th Place finisher as far as I'm concerned. Anoop is crestfallen at the news, which only magnifies the injustice of Matt's still being there. He sings his song again and I can only wonder what could have been. Fare thee well, Anoop! I doubt Matt's non-existent career will be any better than yours!

So we finally have a pimp-spotter who gets eliminated before the Top 4. Of course, the elimination order suggests he was only the second-lowest vote-getter. On a normal week the pimp spot would've kept him alive.

Power Rankings:

5. Allison Iraheta. Now she's stuck in the opposite gender slot, since a guy will almost certainly win. With Anoop going home it must be a sign that my other favorites are about to start dropping.

4. Matt Giraud. Yep, we have to deal with this intruder for a few more weeks.

3. Kris Allen. If it were up to me he'd win this thing, but since I'm not allowed to get my way in anything in life, he'll go out here.

2. Danny Gokey. I honestly don't get how he keeps advancing. I guess it's time to face the facts: the powers that be are going to pimp him to the finale by any means possible.

1. Adam Lambert. Danny's housewife voters won't be enough to beat the guy who's far more talented and entertaining.

If Matt had gone home this week I might have forgiven the judges for saving him. Instead he's going to be there taunting me next week, and probably the week after. The only thing that can save this season now is if Kris or Allison wins. A victory for one of the underpimped underdogs would actually make me feel like this show had something heartwarming to offer. I like Adam, but rooting for an overdog isn't as fun or rewarding. I was loving this season, "Idol," but you botched it when you saved Matt. Get rid of the Judges' Save next year or you're probably going to lose me as a viewer. Aw, who am I kidding? I'll probably still watch out of morbid curiosity. I don't know if the show will be worth my time to blog about anymore though.

Until next time, I'm out of here.